why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
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