if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
