I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Randomize
