Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
