she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
