Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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