apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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