Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
