i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
im holly from the hills drunk
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
pop tarts are not kleenex
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Randomize
