I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize