We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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