Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize