He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Can I get my morals surgically removed?