i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
