did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
