She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
