These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
