Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
