Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
