it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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