I must be too annoying 4 u.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
