I'm really into asian looking animals
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
