Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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