it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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