Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
