I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
