glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
