Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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