Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
