Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame