have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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