i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
