He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Is Oprah even human
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
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