Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
