Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
