Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
