She said her name was "party"
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize