did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
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