thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
