We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
he was CRYING into my vagina
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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