Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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