We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
