Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize