We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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