So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize