it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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