She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize