Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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