2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
