Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(860): View more from Connecticut

The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one

Fav 27 6548 1242
share tweet
(646): View more from New York

I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.

Fav 17 6755 1366
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(770): View more from Georgia

No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.

Fav 9 3802 961
share tweet
(915): View more from Texas

Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?

Fav 15 1405 3117
share tweet
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Read it at the TFLN blog
(256): View more from Alabama

hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by

(256): View more from Alabama

he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch

Fav 13 2350 1038
share tweet
(425): View more from Washington

Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?

Fav 7 814 706
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(954): View more from Florida

I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?

Fav 9 712 1789
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(330): View more from Ohio

After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.

Fav 3 559 251
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(631): View more from New York

You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.

Fav 1 13 31
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT