my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
